Have you?

have you ever had a burning fire inside your soul?
one that's too strong to control.
one you feel with every jealousy or pain...
one that makes you go insane.
have you ever tricked yourself into believing,
that your "friends" aren't really deceiving.
have you ever wanted to scream but were too weak to try,
a howl so deadly it'd make a dead man cry.
have you ever wanted to close your eyes and hide,
be like a turtle and lock yourself inside?
have your ears heard things that would make them want to bleed?
and the anger in your soul would pick up the greatest speed.
have you ever felt so little so betrayed?
that's left your heart feeling slayed.
have you ever not felt love in a while that you crave,
to hold the hand of your lovers' wave?
or have you longed to feel the lips,
of your lovers mouth on the glass he sips?
have you ever been unable to hear beating from you chest?
that the worries in your soul cease to rest.
i deny my beauty and compare who i am,
and got lost inside my own little spam.
i compare my blessings and deny my ways,
and inside i am a haze.
if only these feelings bottled up inside,
would come out one day not afraid to hide.
and one day be strong enough to finally say,
"I'm beautiful in every way"
but lying to yourself won't get you anywhere but failure,
and this is the future i endure.
the question is simple, this is true,
in these experienced feelings of pain, have you..?